... when a bum gives you a quarter
... when the "service engine soon" light turns on, and you're riding a bike
... when you're 10 seconds from orgasm and you hear footsteps on the stairs
... The doctor leaves the room to call his broker
... you finish stringing your guitar, set it down, and hear a distinctive "twang"
... Your car smells like old spice, and your Boyfriend is allergic to all perfumes
... When reading a cheap Jeff Foxworthy ripoff like this is more entertaining than the porn you normally look at.
Friday, October 27, 2006
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Extreme secularism
It's a term I just heard. Fairly obviously it came from a religious conservative, and got me wondering what exactly that meant. Obviously a secular extremist would be the opposite of a religious extremist. I started thinking about what this would mean and came up with the following items:
Religious extremists like to picket outside of concert venues, theaters and funerals. Secular exremists must therefore like to hold the door for you, and pass you a tissue when you get all weepy.
Religious extremists often cite their own religious texts as the answer to any question. Secular extremists would therefore have to quote a secular book. Like Dr. Seuss, or a scientific journal.
Religious extremists use torture to get people to convert to their religious beliefs. Secular extremists would therefore offer you a comforting foot massage and beverage.
Religious extremists use cars and planes to blow things up. Like shopping malls, or skyscrapers. Secular extremists would apparently drive to these same buildings, and just park in the parking lot making sure not to dent the car next to them. Or better yet, walk so that if they get into an accident on the way there, there's less chance of an explosion.
Religious extremists like to wear lots of uncomfortable clothing. Secular extremists seem to favor sweat pants and thongs.
Religious extremists have a long history of sexual inequality and mysogeny. Secular extremists are more likely to try the "reverse cowboy", and have female co-workers.
Religious extremists tend engage in activities that necessitate hiding in caves so the authorities don't know where they are. Those of a secular extremist nature would live with some friends, and throw parties of such magnitude that the authorities in the next county over would know where they lived.
Religious extremists tend to avoid alcohol and other recreational drugs. Secular extremists understand the phrase "puff puff give".
Religious extremists tend to believe very odd things, even when compared to others of a more moderate version of their own faith. It only stands to reason that secular extremists would have to see some proof before they accepted the kool-aid.
Religious extremists have a tendency to seperate people of different genders, even going so far as to shield the groups from each others sights, while villifying homosexuality. Secular extremists wonder if the cutie over there is going to hit on them or their signifigant other, and are equally comfortable with either possibility.
Religious extremists bomb clinics and shoot doctors. Secular extremists pick up doctors from the clinic and buy them an "Irish car bomb" at the bar. (Jameson and Guinness where I'm from. but recipes vary)
Religious extremists will denounce a piece of fiction as being heretical and hold demonstrations before the piece is even open to public view. Secular extremists will buy their date popcorn.
Religious extremists want world piece in the name of their lord and are willing to kill for it. Secular extremists will be happy with a world wide cease fire in the name of well... anybody really. I hear Ari Fleisher is looking for work...
Religious extremists adorn their bodies with cool symbols of their beliefs. Secular extremists adorn their bodies with tatoos in Japanese becasue they believe it looks cool.
Religious extremists give their wealth to organized religious groups. Secular extremists give some change for the guy on the corner who was turned away by a religious charity.
Religious conservatives like to talk about how much they love their deity of choice and should rejoice in it's creation. Secualr extremists are too busy rejoicing to talk about it.
Others?
Religious extremists like to picket outside of concert venues, theaters and funerals. Secular exremists must therefore like to hold the door for you, and pass you a tissue when you get all weepy.
Religious extremists often cite their own religious texts as the answer to any question. Secular extremists would therefore have to quote a secular book. Like Dr. Seuss, or a scientific journal.
Religious extremists use torture to get people to convert to their religious beliefs. Secular extremists would therefore offer you a comforting foot massage and beverage.
Religious extremists use cars and planes to blow things up. Like shopping malls, or skyscrapers. Secular extremists would apparently drive to these same buildings, and just park in the parking lot making sure not to dent the car next to them. Or better yet, walk so that if they get into an accident on the way there, there's less chance of an explosion.
Religious extremists like to wear lots of uncomfortable clothing. Secular extremists seem to favor sweat pants and thongs.
Religious extremists have a long history of sexual inequality and mysogeny. Secular extremists are more likely to try the "reverse cowboy", and have female co-workers.
Religious extremists tend engage in activities that necessitate hiding in caves so the authorities don't know where they are. Those of a secular extremist nature would live with some friends, and throw parties of such magnitude that the authorities in the next county over would know where they lived.
Religious extremists tend to avoid alcohol and other recreational drugs. Secular extremists understand the phrase "puff puff give".
Religious extremists tend to believe very odd things, even when compared to others of a more moderate version of their own faith. It only stands to reason that secular extremists would have to see some proof before they accepted the kool-aid.
Religious extremists have a tendency to seperate people of different genders, even going so far as to shield the groups from each others sights, while villifying homosexuality. Secular extremists wonder if the cutie over there is going to hit on them or their signifigant other, and are equally comfortable with either possibility.
Religious extremists bomb clinics and shoot doctors. Secular extremists pick up doctors from the clinic and buy them an "Irish car bomb" at the bar. (Jameson and Guinness where I'm from. but recipes vary)
Religious extremists will denounce a piece of fiction as being heretical and hold demonstrations before the piece is even open to public view. Secular extremists will buy their date popcorn.
Religious extremists want world piece in the name of their lord and are willing to kill for it. Secular extremists will be happy with a world wide cease fire in the name of well... anybody really. I hear Ari Fleisher is looking for work...
Religious extremists adorn their bodies with cool symbols of their beliefs. Secular extremists adorn their bodies with tatoos in Japanese becasue they believe it looks cool.
Religious extremists give their wealth to organized religious groups. Secular extremists give some change for the guy on the corner who was turned away by a religious charity.
Religious conservatives like to talk about how much they love their deity of choice and should rejoice in it's creation. Secualr extremists are too busy rejoicing to talk about it.
Others?
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Um, yeah, better...
So after checking my e-mail and Signing out I come across an article about how people feel they are worse off than their parents. The general thrust was that we're better off financially. However their arguments were fairly misleading. Considering that the source of the article I was reading was a magazine catering to the wealthy and wanna-be wealthy, this is understandable. (Forbes)
Here is the most important thing they brought up: According to their numbers: median income has increased by about 1/3 since the mid 1960's. (13% better than the mid 90's.. which means 2/3 of our supposed increase in prosperity came before Reaganomics "saved" us from the evils of government regulation) However the average income for those at the upper end of the economic spectrum have seen their incomes (adjusted for inflation) increase from about 40 times the median, to over 400 times the median.
To make this personal, imagine you are working for a company, and recieve a 33% raise. Pretty good right? the company must be making making money, you're doing your job well. Everything is good. Presumably other people in the company recieved increases of similar size since you're all working together to produce quality products and happy customers. However your boss recieved a 900% raise. 866% more of a raise than you recieved. Are you still going to be as happy working for that company? Doubtful, because while you can accept that your boss will recieve a larger sum of money in their raise, it would be reasonable to assume that it would be in proportion to your raise.
Compounding the problem is that the cost of living doesn't always increase in ways that are able to be adjusted for inflation. The computer I'm typing this on for example, can't be compared to a basic model personal computer from the 1960's. Because they didn't exist, but the PC is as much a basic part of life now as the Television set was then. So there is an added increase in the cost of living, just to be able to do banking, job searches, deal with some government agencies and communicate with each other.
A standard household of 4.5 people now has the added expenses of cable tv, cell phones, land lines, internet service, microwave ovens, and an almost 50% tax burden. (Approx. 33% wage taxes including soc sec. etc. , 6-8% sales tax, 3-5% property taxes, "sin" taxes, other surcharges and hidden taxes that aren't taken directly out of our paychecks) So apart from basic inflation pressures, that 33% is not going to our retirement accounts or business investments. It's going to the increased expense of living, not an increase in the relative quality of living.
Another area they didn't explore was how many employers offered quality health care, retirement packages, company parties, or vacation time.
The one area where they acknowledged their shortcomings was to let us know that the numbers thay were using did not include investment income. So the dividends on the free or highly discounted stocks the CEO purchased last year, aren't included. They only looked at wages.
There are many ways we are better off as a country than we were 40 years ago. We have more personal, religious, and expressionist freedoms. People no longer have to take to the streets in order to recieve basic rights like voting, and we don't have an "enemy" who can stand toe to toe with our militry and win. There is no need to distort numbers and give useles information in a "news" article. Unless the purpose of the article is to make people feel good about themselves for being the rich leaders of a robust economy, or for plugging away at their increasingly worthless jobs.
Here are the questions that need to asked to see if we are truly better or worse off than we were 40 years ago:
How many hours per week do the households wage earners need to work in order to cover all bills, and put some money into savings/ investments?
What percentage of your income goes to entertainment and recreation?
If you need to see a doctor or dentist, can you afford to?
How many day's or weeks of vacation do you have available per year?
Does your company offer a good retirement package?
Are you confident your company produces quality products?
Have you gone without a neccessity such as food, clothing, or shelter in the past 10 years?
Can you occassionally splurge on a nice dinner or family night out without having to worry about how you're going to pay for it?
Can you afford to send your children (or yourself) to college?
These questions would give a better understanding of how we are doing as oppossed to our parents and grandparents than a strict a simple analysis of income.
Here is the most important thing they brought up: According to their numbers: median income has increased by about 1/3 since the mid 1960's. (13% better than the mid 90's.. which means 2/3 of our supposed increase in prosperity came before Reaganomics "saved" us from the evils of government regulation) However the average income for those at the upper end of the economic spectrum have seen their incomes (adjusted for inflation) increase from about 40 times the median, to over 400 times the median.
To make this personal, imagine you are working for a company, and recieve a 33% raise. Pretty good right? the company must be making making money, you're doing your job well. Everything is good. Presumably other people in the company recieved increases of similar size since you're all working together to produce quality products and happy customers. However your boss recieved a 900% raise. 866% more of a raise than you recieved. Are you still going to be as happy working for that company? Doubtful, because while you can accept that your boss will recieve a larger sum of money in their raise, it would be reasonable to assume that it would be in proportion to your raise.
Compounding the problem is that the cost of living doesn't always increase in ways that are able to be adjusted for inflation. The computer I'm typing this on for example, can't be compared to a basic model personal computer from the 1960's. Because they didn't exist, but the PC is as much a basic part of life now as the Television set was then. So there is an added increase in the cost of living, just to be able to do banking, job searches, deal with some government agencies and communicate with each other.
A standard household of 4.5 people now has the added expenses of cable tv, cell phones, land lines, internet service, microwave ovens, and an almost 50% tax burden. (Approx. 33% wage taxes including soc sec. etc. , 6-8% sales tax, 3-5% property taxes, "sin" taxes, other surcharges and hidden taxes that aren't taken directly out of our paychecks) So apart from basic inflation pressures, that 33% is not going to our retirement accounts or business investments. It's going to the increased expense of living, not an increase in the relative quality of living.
Another area they didn't explore was how many employers offered quality health care, retirement packages, company parties, or vacation time.
The one area where they acknowledged their shortcomings was to let us know that the numbers thay were using did not include investment income. So the dividends on the free or highly discounted stocks the CEO purchased last year, aren't included. They only looked at wages.
There are many ways we are better off as a country than we were 40 years ago. We have more personal, religious, and expressionist freedoms. People no longer have to take to the streets in order to recieve basic rights like voting, and we don't have an "enemy" who can stand toe to toe with our militry and win. There is no need to distort numbers and give useles information in a "news" article. Unless the purpose of the article is to make people feel good about themselves for being the rich leaders of a robust economy, or for plugging away at their increasingly worthless jobs.
Here are the questions that need to asked to see if we are truly better or worse off than we were 40 years ago:
How many hours per week do the households wage earners need to work in order to cover all bills, and put some money into savings/ investments?
What percentage of your income goes to entertainment and recreation?
If you need to see a doctor or dentist, can you afford to?
How many day's or weeks of vacation do you have available per year?
Does your company offer a good retirement package?
Are you confident your company produces quality products?
Have you gone without a neccessity such as food, clothing, or shelter in the past 10 years?
Can you occassionally splurge on a nice dinner or family night out without having to worry about how you're going to pay for it?
Can you afford to send your children (or yourself) to college?
These questions would give a better understanding of how we are doing as oppossed to our parents and grandparents than a strict a simple analysis of income.
Saturday, October 14, 2006
Smile and nod
That's all we need to do, just keep smiling and nodding. Yes Mr. President things are going well, yes mr. President the people love you. High level officials in serious suits telling the president waht her wants to hear. An auditorium full of cheering people, shouting for a constitutional amendment so he can run again.
All occurring in an Ivory tower, far from the people as the rest of us try to live our lives without killing somebody, or being killed.
All occurring in an Ivory tower, far from the people as the rest of us try to live our lives without killing somebody, or being killed.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Monday, October 09, 2006
Too many thoughts.
I have become convinced that the reason I am unemployed is that I value competance, and that just doesn't fit in with the overall business/ employer philosophy of the moment. For example, I have recieved 1 out of 7-8 pieces of mail that I know were sdent to me in the past month by the unemployment people. 1 out of 7-8. With stats like that they would be sent back down to the minors if they were baseball players. What other profession can consider 1 out of 7 a success?
Terrorism. Terrorists can afford to send out 7 guys and only have one success.
The USPS is now officially a terrorist organization. We no longer have to worry about Al-Quaida mailing us anthrax and chain letters, we now have to worry that the USPS will realize the opower it has over our daily lives. The really scary part is that Al-quaida at least has some half witted religious doctrine to kill people over. The USPS just wants to get paid. (That's why they keep raising rates.. even when their costs go down.) This means they are open to service the highest bidders whims.
The cell phone CO. wants you to sign up for a direct debit service so they can take your money without presenting you a bill first. A service that might sound like a good idea if you're paying late charges all the time because the USPS "loses" the bill every month.
The politician who promises to cut welfare spending realizes that if people don't get their checks, they can't cash them. A few key promised votes in the next term and said politian keeps his promise.
You know what does get through? Circulars for Wal-mart, target and their ilk. Further proof that this conspiracy theory may be more accurate than most.
Terrorism. Terrorists can afford to send out 7 guys and only have one success.
The USPS is now officially a terrorist organization. We no longer have to worry about Al-Quaida mailing us anthrax and chain letters, we now have to worry that the USPS will realize the opower it has over our daily lives. The really scary part is that Al-quaida at least has some half witted religious doctrine to kill people over. The USPS just wants to get paid. (That's why they keep raising rates.. even when their costs go down.) This means they are open to service the highest bidders whims.
The cell phone CO. wants you to sign up for a direct debit service so they can take your money without presenting you a bill first. A service that might sound like a good idea if you're paying late charges all the time because the USPS "loses" the bill every month.
The politician who promises to cut welfare spending realizes that if people don't get their checks, they can't cash them. A few key promised votes in the next term and said politian keeps his promise.
You know what does get through? Circulars for Wal-mart, target and their ilk. Further proof that this conspiracy theory may be more accurate than most.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
